i loved the concept of this prompt! definitely pushed me out of my comfort zone by trying to write super short poems, and playing with white space around the lines. i ultimately ended up with a poem that tried to underline all the other sounds in this moment, and use those to evoke the silence of a moment left unfinished.
fluorescent buzz of the lights matches the numbness in my ears. a minute ago, this room was filled with confusion, swirling around me until it stole the questions right from my breath. i didn’t take the click of the lock for the finality that it was. didn’t understand that my world could implode, not with a crash, but with the scrape of a wooden door across the floor. and i was left sitting there.
lovely, very TS Eliot "not with a bang but a whimper" ending. the wooden scrape sound is so evocative. I also love the idea of a room swirling, a room with agency, a room that can steal. that feels true to my experience of rooms
Loved this prompt! Here's a response.
"Precision and Excess"
On my phone screen, you rise briefly,
reach over and draw a curtain to block the sun.
Suddenly you fill the whole screen, your grey sweater
shifting over your stomach, thick ribbing clear to the
shimmering threads, surging as if it’s six years earlier and
you’ve just returned to me after a long waiting. Great wings,
and this small singing. I have not forgotten anything.
A curtain falls. Your sweater shifts again.
Not one but multiple floods here, spilling over.
this is beautiful, i especially love the last line!
i loved the concept of this prompt! definitely pushed me out of my comfort zone by trying to write super short poems, and playing with white space around the lines. i ultimately ended up with a poem that tried to underline all the other sounds in this moment, and use those to evoke the silence of a moment left unfinished.
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"unfinished"
fluorescent buzz of the lights matches the numbness in my ears. a minute ago, this room was filled with confusion, swirling around me until it stole the questions right from my breath. i didn’t take the click of the lock for the finality that it was. didn’t understand that my world could implode, not with a crash, but with the scrape of a wooden door across the floor. and i was left sitting there.
lovely, very TS Eliot "not with a bang but a whimper" ending. the wooden scrape sound is so evocative. I also love the idea of a room swirling, a room with agency, a room that can steal. that feels true to my experience of rooms